So this is a venting story about a 17 hour flight with someone who has a gas issue ...
For most people its the basic checklist to ensure comfort on a 8+ hour flight:
--A good book (or your Kindle)
--An iPod
--Earphones
--Neck pillow
--Comfy shoes and socks
Now if you have rotten intestines your checklist is a bit different.
If you know your intestines are rotten and filled with a nose insulting powerful gas - and this is an issue, especially when plane food is introduced, please prepare! Fact: human gas contains flammable, poisonous gases such as carbon dioxide -- now why would I want to inhale this in a closed environment?? Prepare before flight with a detox. For the flight, pack some Gas-X, Beano...avoid gas causing foods that trigger your gas issue.
Now, I don't know who the culprit is: the woman in front of me who clearly does not wear deodorant and yet puts her seat all the way back so that her body order invades my space, the obese South African white man behind me who snoozed and snored for 10 of those 17 hours (damn I guess he slept good huh? LOL) or the Asian-American volunteer with the dirty feet and flip flops to my right but one them has a burnin' asshole! They had gas for 8 hours - a constant choking mist was in the air around me for 8 hours! There was a break and I managed to fall asleep only for that nap to be interrupted by a powerful gas mask needing gastrointestinal release that woke me up in a choke. No, literally, I woke up gagging with watery eyes *disgusted and blown* I just hope and pray this person consumes water and flushes their system which brings me to the next thing they need on their list: a body spray. The Body Shop sells a spray that serves as a body, linen and room spray. Its $20 and fits TSA regulations. To this gassy person I beg, "Invest...please, invest" this way you can spray in the small bathroom on the plane once you clean out your system.
To recap, a checklist for the gassy:
--pre-cleanse your system with the 7-day detox from GNC
--Beano or Gas-X
--Body, Linen and Room spray by The Body Shop
--A good book (or your Kindle)
--An iPod
--Earphones
--Neck pillow
--Comfy shoes and socks
This ensures not only you are comfy on a long journey but so are those around you.
This has been a public service request. And thank you.
For most people its the basic checklist to ensure comfort on a 8+ hour flight:
--A good book (or your Kindle)
--An iPod
--Earphones
--Neck pillow
--Comfy shoes and socks
Now if you have rotten intestines your checklist is a bit different.
If you know your intestines are rotten and filled with a nose insulting powerful gas - and this is an issue, especially when plane food is introduced, please prepare! Fact: human gas contains flammable, poisonous gases such as carbon dioxide -- now why would I want to inhale this in a closed environment?? Prepare before flight with a detox. For the flight, pack some Gas-X, Beano...avoid gas causing foods that trigger your gas issue.
Now, I don't know who the culprit is: the woman in front of me who clearly does not wear deodorant and yet puts her seat all the way back so that her body order invades my space, the obese South African white man behind me who snoozed and snored for 10 of those 17 hours (damn I guess he slept good huh? LOL) or the Asian-American volunteer with the dirty feet and flip flops to my right but one them has a burnin' asshole! They had gas for 8 hours - a constant choking mist was in the air around me for 8 hours! There was a break and I managed to fall asleep only for that nap to be interrupted by a powerful gas mask needing gastrointestinal release that woke me up in a choke. No, literally, I woke up gagging with watery eyes *disgusted and blown* I just hope and pray this person consumes water and flushes their system which brings me to the next thing they need on their list: a body spray. The Body Shop sells a spray that serves as a body, linen and room spray. Its $20 and fits TSA regulations. To this gassy person I beg, "Invest...please, invest" this way you can spray in the small bathroom on the plane once you clean out your system.
To recap, a checklist for the gassy:
--pre-cleanse your system with the 7-day detox from GNC
--Beano or Gas-X
--Body, Linen and Room spray by The Body Shop
--A good book (or your Kindle)
--An iPod
--Earphones
--Neck pillow
--Comfy shoes and socks
This ensures not only you are comfy on a long journey but so are those around you.
This has been a public service request. And thank you.
This is too much!!!!
ReplyDelete