Thanksgiving in Abidjan

Our hostess Ana and Pete

This year I was away from my family on the Thanksgiving holiday for the first time since Peace Corps.  Thankfully I was surrounded by great people (old and new friends) and amazing food! As I was determined to have a "taste" of home here in Abidjan, my suitcase was packed with two cans of Glory Collard Greens and pre-mixed dry ingredients to make "sweet" cornbread.  However, as this dry mix was in a zip lock bag it was confiscated by TSA.  I expected this may happen so I also packed two boxes of Jiffy (#winning).  Thanksgiving is not a holiday here and so Karim and I worked until 230pm and then went to the grocery store so that he could procure ingredients for his gourmet side salad, cake, cheese and wine. We arrived at the home of our beautiful hostess, Ana, a little after 4pm as we expected to roll up our sleeves and be in the kitchen.  

But she had this covered with two people chopping, glazing, prepping and stuffing two chickens before our arrival.  However, I did assist in making the cornbread and whipped up the honey butter which I glazed on the cornbread before it was served.  Karim was not allowed to completely chop the ingredients for his gourmet salad but he did whip up an amazing homemade salad dressing (oil, balsamic vinegar, garlic, parsley and dijon mustard).  So in the end, we felt kinda useful in the kitchen haha 

Karim making salad dressing

Pete about to carve the chickens

While the food was being prepared and guests were arriving, the small group sat around, watched the children play, listened to music, sipped on adult beverages or worked while sipping on Coke (Karim).

Karim working and sipping on coke

Shawntel on the phone

Once all of the guests arrived (around 8:30pm) Pete had the honor of carving the chickens.  Once chicken was carved, prayer in French and English was said and everyone dived in!  Dinner, conversation, laughter, meet/greet and bilingual conversation continued throughout dinner and dessert.  As everyone had to work the next day, the night did end at midnight.  While I missed my family terribly on this holiday, I am thankful for the experience - how many can say they spent Thanksgiving in Abidjan and not have been an expat?! Experience my Thanksgiving in Abidjan through the photos below.  Enjoy!

Cornbread

Collard greens

Potato bake

Green bean casserole

Salad with goat cheese

Those yummy stuffed chickens

The table

Pie

Beverages

Thankful ... for Clown Exodus

During these cold winter months and with the holidays approaching, many singles are running around trying to find someone with whom they can hibernate all winter long.  But I say to you singles, be thankful for the clowns which have not been allowed /refused to enter the future with you.  At the moment, I know the break up or rejection was painful, but I am a true believer that “sometimes rejection is God’s protection.”  So this Thanksgiving, while I am of course thankful for my family (blood and spiritual), my job, my best and truest friends and my health, I am also very thankful to have avoided further heartbreak, tears, screams, sleepless nights and drama in my clown-free present.  This year there was a grand exodus of three clowns in my life, for which I am thankful.  Let’s recap, shall we:

Exodus of Clown #3:  “I am going to invite you to my city and then act a donkey when I don’t get no booty…”  Are you really that lonely?  I guess the hint for me should have been that he had no options locally.  Duh Phoebe.  No further explanation is really needed since the story is documented in an earlier blog.  Thankful note:  I not only left with no regrets since he received zero sexual romps but I also avoided being seen around town with such a loser!  The local ladies clearly knew something I did not! #canwegetnationalwarnings?

Exodus of Clown #2:  “You are no doubt what I would I ask the Lord for – my perfect woman! … Oh did I mention I have a girlfriend?”  Is this an acceptable approach?  This one annoys me on the fact that relationship status was revealed after time was spent, kisses and numbers were exchanged, plans for dinners were made and oh when I asked the question for the third time.  WHO does this?  I would venture to say a sociopath who is not concerned with anyone’s feelings minus his own.  Dear Clown:  be honest up front.  Being dishonest eliminates my options, which is not playing fair.  Yes, I am going to give you the disgust face and walk away BUT there may be women out there who do not care and will move right on ahead.  And ladies do not think you would be the special one that will make him want to be faithful or tell yourself “well his woman isn’t holding it down …” No, this man is the one to avoid at all costs.  You are not special in his eyes other than being the newest conquest.   Thankful note:  with avoidance of this clown I am pretty sure I also avoided Hepatitis C and/or genital warts.  

Exodus of Clown #1:  “I should not even be bothered but because I love you …” #clownoftheyearaward  Tell me how you REALLY feel clown!  Love is “kind … it is not prideful … it protects”  A man who love you, truly loves you – these words would not only never come out of his mouth but would never cross his mind.  He does not consider “chasing you” or ensuring you feel/know love through his actions and words as “being a bother.”  Additionally, when you express disappointment in his standing you up because he prioritized something else over meeting you or missing a date (which he requested…but Im sure something more important came up) he does not blame you for being (naturally I believe) upset/disappointed and voicing these feelings (without cussing, for which I thank the Holy Lamb).  He acknowledges where he went wrong (or he doesn’t stand you up in the first place, but I digress).  When you cry, he wants to be the resolution and see you smile – he doesn’t accuse you of always being emotional.  When you yell, his actions calm you and he knows when the time is right to initiate a discussion to resolve the issue.  When you feel “ugly” or “bloated” during that time of the month, he rubs your belly, feeds you chocolate, kisses you and reminds you of how beautiful you are.  The extra “little things” he does to ensure you are happy with him and in general do not “bother” him.  In fact, he too finds happiness!  Not only in your smile but also when we women are happy, we ensure our man is happy!  When a man “bothers” to do the little things, I “bother” to do something to let him know I appreciated his kindness, his show of love and add a little extra to show him love in return.  For over a year and some extra months this man has been telling me he loves me, can see me as his wife, spiritual partner and mother of his children.   I am thankful that God has revealed to me that this man and I do not define LOVE the same.  I never want someone to be “bothered” to do or say anything to me.  And the man that God presents to me as my future mate won’t feel “bothered” to ensure I feel and know love.